Valentine’s Day tends to shine a particular spotlight on love. Romantic love. Partnered love. The kind of love that comes in heart-shaped boxes and social media captions. And while there’s nothing wrong with celebrating connection with others, this time of year can also quietly stir up feelings of loneliness, pressure, or self-criticism.

I encourage you to widen that definition of love. Because before we focus on seeking love from others, it’s important to look at the relationship we have with ourselves.

As the calendar turns and January 1st appears, many of us feel a familiar surge of motivation. This is it, we think. This is the year I finally get my life together. We promise ourselves big changes: working out five days a week, eating perfectly, fixing our sleep, managing stress flawlessly.

But here’s the truth: for most adults, especially after the past few years we’ve lived through, that change can feel overwhelming before it even begins.

As 2025 comes to a close, many of us are noticing something familiar yet uncomfortable: that blend of excitement, anxiety, and pressure that tends to show up right before the new year. If you’ve felt that knot in your stomach while thinking about 2026, you’re not alone. This season can stir up questions like Am I doing enough? Am I ready? Did I even meet my goals for this year?

But here’s the truth: preparing for the new year doesn’t have to mean rigid resolutions or even intentions. It can be as simple and as powerful as pausing to reflect, looking at your new year anxiety with compassion, and gently considering how you want to move into the next year of your life.

November is synonymous with Thanksgiving.

It’s wonderful. And often exhausting.

Because let’s be honest: there’s pressure in this season. We’re encouraged (or flat-out told) to be grateful. For our families. For our jobs. For our homes. For all the people and privileges in our lives. And while that’s a lovely and worthy practice, it can also unintentionally push us away from something equally important: gratitude for ourselves.

October often feels like the quiet drumroll before the holiday season begins. At the end of the month, we kick off with Halloween—a favorite for both kids and adults. Then comes November and Thanksgiving, which quickly rolls into December with Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and more. Lastly, but not least, January marks the beginning of the New Year.

That’s four months of celebrations, expectations, and transitions all stacked together. It’s no wonder that, for many, October is when we start to prepare mentally. We make lists. We check our calendars. We start thinking about travel plans, gifts, budgets, and all the moving parts that make up “the holidays.”

But let’s pause here and check in.

Mother’s Day is just around the corner. For some of your friends and family, it’s a warm celebration filled with flowers, brunch, and heartfelt cards. But that warm fuzziness seems a pipe dream for you. It’s a complicated day that puts a knot in your stomach and an ache in your heart.

When we think of the New Year, we often think of resolutions, goals, and otherwise things we're looking forward to achieving. We also tend to take into stock what we wanted to do, or what we didn't manage to achieve last year. Maybe things like the money we didn't manage to save, or the weight we didn't lose. When we start thinking like this, we tend to take on a negative mindset and begin to criticize ourselves.

This year, let’s shift our focus away from what we didn’t accomplish and begin the New Year with a more positive outlook.

The holiday season often comes with a set of traditions and rituals that we've grown up with. You might even say these traditions are what make the holidays special.

One thing’s important though. It's essential to recognize that we can create our own holiday traditions.