Creating Your Own Traditions for the Holidays

The holiday season often comes with a set of traditions and rituals that we've grown up with—like a certain day you set up the Christmas tree or decorate the house, who cooks what and who hosts for holiday dinners, and what family you visit on certain days. These traditions, rooted in family history, have a unique charm and bring a sense of comfort. You might even say these traditions are what make the holidays special.

I want to point out something important though. It's essential to recognize that we can create our own holiday traditions. This doesn't mean that the old family customs are wrong or harmful; it simply means that we can choose to do something different that resonates more with our values and desires, and if we do decide to do something that is different from what our family did and maybe still does, that that's ok.

Let’s explore crafting your own holiday traditions and the many ways it can be gratifying, uplifting, and make your connections even stronger.

The Importance of Choice

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Sometimes, particularly when it comes to holiday traditions, we may feel obligated to do what we have always done with our family such as attend services, go to dinners, or give gifts, even if it may be uncomfortable or stressful. The beauty of creating your own holiday traditions lies in the freedom it gives you to make choices that align with your personal preferences and values. This isn't to say you have to snub your old traditions; it's about celebrating the holidays in a way that truly resonates with you.

Consider this: rather than feeling bound by the expectations of what holidays "should" look like, think about what truly makes you happy and fulfilled during this time of year. If that means continuing with large family dinners and gifts galore, great! If that means a quiet dinner at home and an act of charity instead, that's okay too!

Shift from Stress to Joy

Take for example one common source of stress during the holidays: the grand, elaborate Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanaza dinner at home. Many people spend hours in the kitchen, feeling overwhelmed and pressured to create a picture-perfect meal. Instead of adhering to this tradition, why not opt for a different approach? Consider going to a restaurant with loved ones to savor a meal without the stress of cooking, allowing everyone to focus on quality time together rather than the stove.

Refocus on Community

In the spirit of creating new traditions, consider adopting community-centered rituals. Instead of traditional and sometimes financially draining gift exchanges among friends or family, think about organizing a community service day. This could be something like volunteering your time to help those in need, donating to local charities, or buying toys for children who are less fortunate.

These acts of kindness not only make a positive impact on others but also strengthen your connection with the community. Plus, as an added bonus, they're more than likely to make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Renew Your Holiday Spirit

While it may be difficult (and may cause a stir among family and friends who are set in their ways,) crafting your own holiday traditions can be a deeply satisfying experience. By choosing activities and customs that align with your values, you'll feel a more authentic connection to the season. You'll no longer do things "because that's what we always do," you'll practice personalized traditions that bring you a sense of purpose, meaning, and fulfillment to your holidays, reminding you that the season is about more than just material gifts and sometimes stressful get-togethers.

Therapy for Holiday Anxiety in Charlotte, NC

As we grow up, we inherit holiday traditions and rituals that have been passed down through generations. We remember these traditions fondly (and maybe sometimes not so fondly,) and recognize that these special times have created a part of who we are. But, while these traditions are valuable and hold a special place in our hearts, it's essential to remember that we have the power to create our own holiday traditions. And, that it's not a crime to do so.

Whether it's a shift from stressful, multi-family dinners to small, restaurant gatherings, or a change from Secret Santa gift exchanges to community service, crafting your unique holiday rituals can be incredibly meaningful and joyous. These choices can make you more grateful, more connected to your community and loved ones, and ultimately help you embrace the true spirit of the season (yes, really!) So, this holiday season, take a step back, reflect on what truly matters to you, and feel empowered to create your own traditions that bring joy and meaning.

If the prospect of the creating your own traditions for the holidays seems daunting or downright impossible, or if you feel like your seasonal anxiety is getting the best of you, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I’m here to help you make the best of the season.

I would like to be clear that this blog post is not intended to substitute for professional counseling. If you are in need of support, please consider speaking to a professional counselor.

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Cheryl Perry

Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor Associate in private practice in Charlotte NC working with individual adults working through symptoms such as stress, anxiety, depression. I also work with adults working to make sense of expected or unexpected life transitions. I also work with LGBTQ+ individuals living with feelings of isolation or simply in need of a safe space to discuss uneasy feelings they have experienced in life.

https://www.perrywellnesscounseling.com
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The Everyday Thanksgiving: Incorporating Small Gratitude into Your Life